To Party or Not to Party?

A few days past, I was privileged to overhear, a polite way of saying that I was eavesdropping, a rather interesting conversation at a social function, namely at a marriage. The participants were both of the elderly feminine gender and the tone was rather hushed, a combination not to be sneezed at, especially when one is bored out of his wits. Now, placed as I was strategically, close enough for hearing and far enough not to be suspected, with keen anticipation, ears assumed supreme importance.

The subject of the conversation was a certain pair of younger ladies being dissected for the purposes of nuptials with some unfortunate of mine gender. Apparently, one was a rather docile and amenable young lady of no specific attributes or qualifications, except that she was of “good” character. The other lady being so scrutinized was wonderful in every possible manner, being a good academician and excellently trained domestically as well as taking care of her parents and working in a well-known company in the city, however the rumour was that she was not of “good” character as she went to, (in scandalized whispers) Parties!!!

My well-meaning though autocratic parents pulled me away before I could take in more escapades of this enthralling adventuress and though I could not hear the end of the story, I am sure that the two, shall we call them well-wishers, must have definitely pressed the cause of the girl who was docile and of ‘good’ character for the impending nuptials of the poor unfortunate.

Is it thus that the generation gap of today could be best expressed? To party or not to Party, with a capital P?

Our parents have brought us up with much love, care and attention to details and without them we would have surely faltered. I know that I would have. However, as much as I love my parents, there is definitely a rift in the manner of understanding, or maybe, today there is too much scrutiny of unnecessary detail.

This is nothing new, nothing original or fresh as one would say, it’s called the generation gap, only I call it the Party Crack.

Our parents, the folks, the old guys, call them what you will, have had the same issues with their parents, their folks, their old guys, whatever. The issue that I am wondering at is not how to bridge the generation gap, but why it evolves and what it signifies.

Today’s generation leads a far more frantic pace of life than the one a generation ago had lived; this is not what we say, but also what our parents had also stated in very loud tones to their parents. We just say it, but apparently THEY sang about it and led a revolution about it!!!

The killing pace of schooling and grad college life is merely the start of the race, for it’s now that the Darwinian theories of survival of the fittest are becoming applicable into human existence. With the frenetic velocity of our lives equaling an F1 racing car, the pit stops, the relaxation periods have also become more demanding.

So also, with spending power, a cup of chai has evolved into a cappuccino and an evening out has evolved into a party. This is the new twist in the tail, as Gen Y would say to Gen X, whose tail is already in enough knots as it is what with the Generations A to W preceding.

This is not an excuse or an apology for our lifestyle today, merely a perspective on the evolving lifestyles that have been occurring since the industrial revolution. More spending power than the previous generation, influx of western ideas and social idiosyncrasies over the generations preceding has created an interesting hybrid of concepts of traditional values and a mélange of viewpoints.

Most people would say that it’s the advent of responsibilities that creates the GAP, maybe that’s how the company was formed, pun not intended, but that’s not the reason to condemn and castigate or even discriminate.

Its not the fate of the enticing adventuress who goes to (in shocked and scandalized whispers) Parties, that I am affected about, but about the discrimination on the basis of merit, and for the first time, discrimination DUE to merit. Do we have to discriminate about anyone who wishes to live life upon his or her own terms?

Do grades make or break a child? Similarly, does a social life beyond parents and the workplace today define a person as to discriminate or even to be praised or condemned?

A parallel story also evolved which further alienated my views on this existing structure. At another social event, plans were being made for an outing, ostensibly for a movie with dinner afterwards, when a name was proposed which was roundly disapproved. Seemingly, the very attributes, which endeared the previous person at the earlier, i.e. “good” character were a bore and definitely not appreciated as the discipline and lack of fun loving characteristics would create “issues” and spoil the “mood”. Were values such a burden or care and respect such onerous responsibilities as to infringe upon our lives and our entertainment, I wondered then.

Was the very definition wrong or is it merely the crack getting cracked?

The answer is not out there, but nor is it here. In the changing milieu of the social animal, what is the outcome? What is acceptable and what is not? Do we make our beds on an uneasy truce of surface acceptance or do we need to explore this imbalance of identity and image in the ever-changing face of the social order of civilized living?